IF I WAS THE RAPTURE...

I was part of an interesting discussion recently about what makes a great band great. The conclusion was that a great band invents their own genre. Portishead, Black Sabbath, Ac/Dc, Thin Lizzy, Hendrix, Beatles, Beach Boys, Public Enemy...

These groups can do any type of music and still sound like themselves.

Example:



"Deep Water," my favorite song on the new Portishead album, really doesn't have many "Portishead elements," yet it's undeniably them.


Hooverphonic's "2wicky" is obviously a Portishead mimic, but forgettable like all genre mimics, you can't mimic a band that creates its own genre and not be a one hit wonder.

So on to my punchline...

This recent Talking Heads best of disc has a sticker on the front with a recommendation from The Rapture...
Now, if you were the rapture, would it be good for your career to turn your fan base on to an amazing band like the Talking Heads?

If I were in the Rapture I'd be all...
"You know who rules...?"

GODSMACK!!!(Their lead singer is a practicing Wiccan ya know...)

I'd be like:
"You know, Mudvayne never really got their due props."


Or...

"Man,The Spin Doctors are AWESOME!!!!"

SAGE ADVICE FROM THELONIOUS MONK RELAYED THROUGH MIKE WATT

So Mike Watt (The Minutemen, The Stooges -as seen above-) posted this bulletin on myspace, it was really cool so I had to cop it for the blizog. One of the highlights of my career was supporting Watt and former Black Flag bassist Kira Roessler

at the Smell in L.A. during the last (and only) Black Fiction tour. These are some cool peeps and it makes sense that Watt would post something that inspires a little positive thinking...word.

SAGE ADVICE FROM MR. THELONIOUS MONK

CLICK THE PIC TO READ IT!!!

HELP ME

I'm stuck at work right now with this guy who always plays scratched up folk and blues songs off of his Ipod Shuffle. (The smaller version of the Ipod that Tyra Banks gave to the dwarfs she had on her show as guests as a reward for their flawless runway show, don't believe me?)



Usually it's okay but this time, I'm sure, the vocalist is of the modern Caucasian persuasion. Right now he is singing about sending a "letter to China to see if his baby is over there."
He keeps talking about his broom and how it needs dusting.

And apparently his "momma" makes her biscuits "nice and brown."

This honkey is giving me the blues, he is "built for comfort, not built for speed."

Every time you go away... (bad covers)

Paul Young is a Scottish soul singer who scored a few top ten hits, primarily "Every Time You Go Away" originally recorded by Hall & Oates. Upon a bit of research (for some reason I get curious about things that peeps usually aren't that curious about) I found out his career is based mainly on covers, among them a Joy Division cover.

Anytime someone does a Joy Division cover I'm instantly curious (and or) mortified. Apparently you can make any song into an 80's song.
The embedding has been disabled but you can hear this curiosity by clicking here

This is such a weird cover version that I'm not sure if it's bad or not, it's a completely different song. This is what you get when you put "bad cover" into Google images:

WAY TO BE OBVIOUS!!!

A few more:

The original to cleanse the pallet:


And finally the surprisingly beautiful Squarepusher version:

FOR SOME REASON, EVERY ONCE IN A WHILE, THIS SONG GETS STUCK IN MY HEAD

Percy Faith "Theme From A Summer Place"

This one too...


Johnny Mathis "Wonderful Wonderful"

Mr. Jones...

I know you're a CEO and famous rapper and a hustler and a Harlem American Gangster and all of that but...WHAT THE HELL DOES THIS MEAN!!!!?

(Does it mean that the sight in your right eye is just peachy?)

Pass me a bottle Mr. Jones...

I'VE NEVER UNDERSTOOD THE FRENZY THAT OCCURS EVERY YEAR WHEN...

...3 BILLION XMAS CD'S HIT THE STORES ALL VYING FOR OUR HOLIDAY DOLLAR.

WHOA!!!!

I've been in the record business for 14 years now and it seems that no artist is above the xmas temptation. Even the most hethanistic rock stars catch the xmas bug, no one is immune. Below is a small cross section of album covers meant to show the ridiculousness of this phenominon (1 or 2 may be fake, but probably only 1):
























Now, I'm not an unfeeling heathen, I have a very specific soft spot. When I was a kid the radio stations in Fresno would switch to 24/7 xams mayhem around late November. Every year, me and my mom would wait for one very special song to hit the airwaves and we would always sing along. here you go, Merry Xmas:

THE GREATEST CHRISTMAS SONG EVER RECORDED!!!